2020 A new Challenge

A New Year always excites me! I don’t know why exactly because it is just another day.

Even so, this one day follows both the Gregorian and Julian calendars, and one important recognition that we should make is the Humans like to start over. We like a clean slate, thus the importance in healing, of cleansing the body and the Aura. We like to make sure that we are cleansed and renewed.

New Years Day celebrations give us a global opportunity to achieve much the same thing. We, on that one day, have a collective ability to say “I forgive you.” or “I relinquish you.”  Perhaps you need to say “I let you go.” whether that is a hurt, a habit, or a grief.

This is your day to celebrate all of that. Our day to put aside all the concerns that we may have had all of the old year. To dust off our ‘shelves’, to gather all those things that didn’t serve us after all and to march boldly where we have not ventured before.

Because ‘we’, all the people on this planet, have placed so much energy into the recognition that this one day gives a cleansing opportunity more than any other day, the energy is powerful! Centuries of relief. Centuries of celebrations. DO not waste it. Embrace it and go forth with it.

So, for me, New Years Day is one of the most important days of the Year. I like to use that collective energy to help me channel my energy into the things I want to achieve.

I have failed to do that on occasion, and I noticed the effect all year. So this year, I am celebrating again, quietly, with a drink and some cheese, and a few good friends or possibly just myself and my dogs.

Many people put all their energy into Christmas. I like Christmas, but I also don’t like it. The idea of coming together with people that I may not have shown concern for all year, just because they are ‘family’, the idea of caring about people on one day only, just sucks to me. Don’t do it. Care about those people all year, or do not care at all.

And your opportunity to do this will start on January 2020, at 12 midnight. Don’t waste it. Start caring, start dreaming, start planning and don’t let February the 1st arrive without you having some plans!

May this New Year and Christmas bring you all health, a wealth of knowledge, the energy that you need and just as much challenges as you need to keep your interest.

And please remember that I am a Speaker as well. I am happy to come to events and speak on many different topics of your choosing, such as Near Death Experiences. I’ve had four. Some of the topics I have given keynotes on previously are: Surviving and thriving after catastrophic trauma, Becoming a Medical Intuitive, Healing your body, Raising Autistic Children. How to co-parent with an ex-partner successfully  and many others.

My fees are reasonable.  Enquire through my FB page.

Love and Blessing,

Carmel Bell

Speaker  Author  Healer

Follow me on Facebook: Carmel-Bell-Medical-Intuitive-Conscious-Life-Creator

For all appointment and course enquiries please email <berniebell56@yahoo.com>

Andy saved my life.

I can’t sleep – again.

It’s a thing with me, and has been since I was very young. My overactive mind keeps on going, no matter how much I ignore it. I’m pretty good at ignoring it but it always finds something more to talk to me about. And I always end up listening because it’s just so damn interesting. The things I say to myself. Things I wouldn’t say to anybody else, admissions I wouldn’t make to any confessor, but there I am, making them to me and they keep me awake.

Tonight, it was talking about my dogs. Why my dogs? Because dogs are important to me, more important than sleep I guess. Well – not hard to guess – here I am awake, talking to you about my dogs.

I have two dogs. Two dogs that were unwanted and were going to be destroyed. Two dogs that still have nightmares even though one of them has lived with me for five years now. How bad was his life before he came to me?

You may remember that I died in my sleep about 11 years ago. You would think that this would be the thing that bothers me, but it isn’t. Death doesn’t frighten me in a normal sort of way. I came back because I was asked to, so I did. There have been many times since then that I have begged to be allowed to die again, but my body keeps on ticking. There has been a lot of time where I felt nothing like gratitude for being alive still, having to eat, to drink, to go to the bathroom, dress and wash and think, answer questions and try to feel like I was ‘normal’…but how normal can you be when you have stood on the other side, been home free as it were, and then come back here to the climate, to the fights, to the oil drilling and the politicians who just don’t give a damn.

I won’t kid you, it has been tough. But then I got a dog.

When I was dead, I re-met my old dog, Voltron. Voltron is a German shepherd. Big, golden, impressive. Capable of eating a car, and he did once, annoyed with me leaving him inside for a few minutes – long enough to drop my son off to his Grandmothers house. All windows open, but doors closed. I ran inside, put down the bags, spoke to my ex mother in law (a beautiful soul) kissed my son goodbye and ran back outside to see ‘something’ hanging around Voltron’s head. And something in his mouth. He looked surprised/guilty/annoyed. Voltron did not like being left behind, so he came with me everywhere but today I didn’t have time to stop and chat, so I left him in the car.

And he ate the car. Yep, the roof, the steering wheel, the seatbelt and I think he was probably about to move to the seats next.

He didn’t get into trouble. He had done all he could to show me that he wanted to be with me for every possible moment of his dog life and I let him down. I never left him in the car again. Lesson learned.

When he died it felt like my world crumbled, but not only mine. My son, now 14, my father who considered Voltron to be one of his best friends too. In fact a lot of people were bereft when Voltron died, lying on the lounge room floor of my parents house, my father holding him tightly as he slipped away. I wasn’t there. I was doing something else, somewhere else but the guilt and the grief stayed with me. I felt I failed him again. I had left him behind again and he had died with out me.

I didn’t get another dog. The thought of ‘replacing’ Voltron was unconscionable. He was irreplaceable. And so, dog free, I mourned.

Then I died. I found myself in heaven, or whatever you want to title that place, and one of the first beings I saw was Voltron. He ran up to me with joy in his face. Next to him was my rabbit, Smoky, who had died a year or two before me. I fell to my knees, quite literally, crying with gratitude and joy for the chance to speak to my Vol. And speak we did.

Then, he asked me to do him a favour. He asked me to get another dog. He told me he would send me my dog – ‘Just wait,’ he said ‘he will come to you.’ So wait it did.

I waited for years and I had given up hope. I put it aside and decided to be dog free. Until the day I saw a photo in the GSRV website. It was a German Shepherd, but he was the scrappiest, palest, unhappiest dog I think I had seen for a long time. He had quite a history and was apparently not very adoptable, but my heart sung for this dog. I knew he was meant to be mine.

At this stage in my recovery, I could barely walk. I had little energy and was depressed. I did not know how to keep getting better and I was ready to quit. But this dog, this dog. I had to try to adopt him. And so I applied. A long application process later, Andy, as he is called, was going to be driven to my home for a meet and greet.

His foster carer rang me from her car and asked me to sit outside on my verandah so that she could bring Andy to meet me with some measure of safety. And so I sat.

Andy came through the gate and into my back yard. He looked up the steps at me sitting quietly, and then he ran. My heart was pounding, with fear, nervousness, apprehension. A German Shepherd is a powerful creature with the bite strength of a shark.

Andy stopped in front of me and laid his head in my lap. And I had a dog.

He needed as much healing as I did. He was a runner. Ran away again and again from homes that he had been trialled at. Ran from everyone and everything. Dog aggressive, hated other animals, had nightmares, was severely underweight and had an infection. In short, he was a mess, just like me.

Andy saved my life. From depressed and unable to walk far, we run together every day. About 3.5 kms or more, rain, hail or shine. He has put on 20kgs in weight, loves my cat, and now has a sister, a little husky girl. He plays in the dog park with other dogs, walks leash free never more than a few feet from my side.

And I run. I run with a pacemaker in my chest. I run with a destroyed vestibular from dying. (controls your balance) I run with muscles that had been destroyed from a brain tumour – now removed.

And I am grateful. Grateful for him. Grateful that he sleeps next to me, guards me, loves me.

Andy saved my life.

The Universe through my eyes.

I remember where I was before I was born this time. I talked to the beings that reside in Heaven about my life to come.  I have already lived many lives and in all of them, I have been a ground breaker and a path layer.  This life was to be no different, but as they said to me on each of my return visits since birth,  it wasn’t going to be as easy as I thought it would be.

They were right.

By the time I was five years old, I had been poisoned twice, had more than one operation and burned to death.  My hair had been cut short, into a rough bob despite my wish to have it long and flowing, and it was black, despite being born a blonde.

I have never been one to accept dogma, so I had arguments with the church from as young as I could remember. I didn’t want to call God ‘Father’ – I had my own father and he was all I needed.  Just like my mother who still is the most beautiful woman I have ever gazed at.  I settled on just using ‘God’ and ‘Mary’.

I was fortunate enough to have a brother and several sisters, so I was never alone and as well as them, animals were a key part of my life.  My parents always had animals that they had rescued and we loved those animals.  I remember being beaten up several times in primary school for defending animals against cruel children that I still believe should be given a dose of what they gave out.  I still have scars on my hands from these assaults.  The world is now changing and animal cruelty is decreasing, though not fast enough for Orangutans, Bears, Wombats and Elephants. Let alone the thousands, millions of Cows, Sheep and Pigs that are slaughtered daily in the most inhumane ways.

I was not popular with my classmates because I was outspoken, I think,  and I stood up to them when they bullied other people or hurt animals.

I also stood up to the Nuns who had no business being anywhere near a child at that time and to the teachers who I thought were being cruel.  I once got a beating for taking an extra piece of paper to write on, and one of my baby sisters was accused of stealing a pen – wrongfully – so I had to defend her. 😦

Though the teachers that loved me, loved me until they died.  I looked at the world in a different way to others and those teachers admired that talent.  I lived in a semi imaginary world but my world was full of beings that spoke to me, and as I could also understand the language of animals, I was happy.

I don’t think I attended my first birthday party until I was about 10 and everyone in my class was invited.  It was one of the loneliest events I have ever gone to, but I got to play musical chairs at last and pass the parcel!  Great games, so when I turned 24, I had a grown up kids party with all my friends, with my then 6-year-old son playing adult for all of us!  It was spectacular but he did have a mess of adults determined to win at musical (and broken) chairs on his hands!

I also have never been able to see the problem with same sex relationships.  Two of my Aunts (great Aunts) were lesbians, so to me, it was normal. My maternal grandfather made sure that these two ladies had all they needed, including purchasing them their own home.  Way to go Granpa! He was a man of courage, friends with Simpson in the first world war.

My home life was also an adventure with my father frequently bringing home stray people he had met in his pharmacy – a political refugee from South Africa, hippies from Adelaide who were vegetarian, much to my mothers’ horror because she only discovered that when she served them up their lovely slice of lamb!  With her usual grace and aplomb, Mum swept the offending lamb off their plate and onto her own and dinner continued without fuss.  That was one of many adventurous intrusions by interesting people.

My older brother brought home a Papua New Guinean friend in need of a home, and Mum moved Jodam into one of our bungalows. Jodam is still my brother to this day and a brilliant artist. He calls himself ‘Albert Blackfella’ now, and is the artist who painted the cover of my first book.  Look him up.

I was also raised to feel no differently about men and women. I never went through the woman’s movement or celebrating periods or any other stuff like that. Men and women have always been equal in my eyes, so I have never thought of men being more capable or stronger than me. I learned how to fight and shoot and run and punch and could hold my own in any situation – except against a gun.  I was one of a very few – maybe the only female that I know of – who was respected by all the bike gangs in Melbourne in the 70s and early 80s.  I was called Boots and everyone just knew that I was part of the gang. In fact, I actually started my own bike gang and was President for quite a while.

Eventually, when I had my first child, I grew up and moved out of that world. I wanted more for my child than that world offered, so I also left my first husband and struck out on my own, starting my own fashion design company – hence my love of clothing – and supporting both my son and me, whilst also writing books and poetry in my spare time.

I had been a writer since very young and had – with my fathers help and encouragement – already been published and been featured on radio.  Eventually, I won an international poetry award and satisfied, I gave up writing poetry and fiction.

As I got older, I decided it was time to use my Spiritual skills.  Long before Medical Intuition was known, I was doing just that for people, working with Doctors and Alternative health professionals. I have never jumped on a ‘band wagon’ that I can remember. I decide what is good for my client and I do not fall back on any other wisdom – unless I believe it to be true.  I like to be me, part of a group but not led by the group. I like to walk, not follow, nor lead.

As a result, I have had very little help or assistance in getting ahead, but I figured that may change in time, or so I hoped.  I would like to reach out and touch the world in a big way but for that to happen, I need help from all of you who read this. From those of you who see the light that I shine and appreciate the level of skill, compassion, and honesty that I bring to the table when you consult with me.

Even when I died in 2009, I came back so that I could help more people and be with my family.  After the ambulance arrived and started their time clock, I was dead for a further 42 minutes and up to 20 minutes longer than that, after dying before being found by my husband.  Set a timer, put it on a table in front of you and hold your breath for a long time. Can’t do more than a minute or two? Try that with CPR and Shocks.  Yeah, that was me. Incredible huh?

So, I am asking that all of you who can, please share my page with your friends, please attend the Melbourne Inspiration Event too!  Cheer me on, cheer the others on and see what a storm we in Australia can make!  It is time for Australians to be in the forefront, instead of a second place to the UK or the USA.

I love my life. It has been, I think, bold, brave and adventurous. I regret very few moments of my time on Earth. Some things I have done or not done have haunted me for years – yes, I’m like everyone else.  Hindsight is the perfect vision and sometimes I am blind.  The biggest regret I have though is not being with Voltron, my dog when he died. Not holding his paw and stroking his head and wishing him farewell.  I met him again in heaven when I died the last time.

Being in Heaven again was both magnificent and heartbreaking.  It threw me back a decade in my life and it has been very hard to recover.  I thank all of you who have stood by me through this most confusing and grueling time.  The great news is that I am recovered both from my death and the illness that killed me.  I’m not as fast on my feet or as good with the memory, but I am making the most of what I have been given.

I hope that as many of you as possible will come to the Inspiration Day and hold me as fondly in your hearts as I hold each of you.

I look forward to seeing those of you who can make it next Sunday at the Inspiration Day Event.

Love and Blessings,

Carmel Bell

 

Why Quitting can be good for you

 

 

When you are in the middle of something, whether it’s a creation or a discussion, it’s easy to get lost. Overwhelm can occur without you even noticing it and suddenly you may find yourself confused or lost about what to do or say next.

This is the time to quit! Stop and walk away for a while. Hold up your hand, if it’s a discussion and ask for a pause and then move to some other place. At the very least it’s likely to surprise the other person!

Have a shower, a walk, or a drink, but do something that is different and allows your mind to clear of what you were doing. Maybe break out into a small dance! And a mind drift in the ‘clouds’ is particularly good for creative problem solving.

It’s the same with many other aspects of life too, such as a work situation that you feel hooked into. Sometimes, although it can seem crazy to other people or even yourself, if you are unhappy with where you are, what you are doing, quit. Surely that’s better than burning out?

Take yourself out of the equation and give yourself time to find out what was making you unhappy, while you are standing outside the mess. . You may find that all you needed was some space to reflect and draw up new boundaries or ideas. You might find that the job you were doing is hurting you. It’s better to discover that now than in many years down the line.

If your unhappiness is about a relationship, quitting can also help. You can’t begin your relationship again until you quit the old ways.

There are so many responsibilities in a relationship that it is easy to forget why we were there in the first place. Children or other responsibilities come in and what was a happy duo can become a business arrangement. Quit that right now too! Step away for a while, even if it is only for a day or a weekend, and reflect on what drew you together in the first place. If you don’t stop to smell the rose, all you will be left with is the thorns.

The truth is that you are a long time dead, so your living time deserves a moment of reflection every now and then. Your relationship or work situation will flourish from this reflection too.

Brief ways to Quit: Time enough to defrag.

1: Have a long, hot shower or bath.

2: Go to a day spa and pamper yourself.

3: Visit a friend.

4: Go to the movies alone.

5: Drive to your favorite beach or hilltop and sit for a while.

6: Go to a coffee shop and people watch.

7: Go op shopping and look for a special gift for yourself

8: Go to the zoo for a visit.

 

Longer ways to quit for a bit:

1: Go on a brief retreat.

2: Do a workshop and learn something new.

3: Upgrade a skill that has nothing to do with your work. Doing this may show you that you are capable of doing more than you thought you could.

4: Take a solo trip somewhere for a week or more.  I have taken a few trips by myself to Europe, America, England and Ireland.  Mostly for work purposes, but it gave me time to also review my life.

Remember. Quitting can be good for you in so many ways, but be cautious: quitting in anger or out of spite is seldom a good idea, so quit for a little while and come back with a clear mind.

Carmel Bell

carmel.bell@yahoo.com

 

The side effects of Dying

Earth Sunrise Illustration. Cool Sunrise Illustration. Earth and the Sun. Center Sunrise. Space Illustrations Collection

This is the last in my series about dying for a while. I hope.

Since I have died, I have searched for answers as to why I died, why I recovered and what happens year by year as you move beyond that event. Many people go through a similar thing when they are diagnosed with a crippling disease. From fine one moment, to incredibly altered the next.

It is a deep shock.

For me, coming back to life was a shock. Because of the brain injury most of my life skills had been removed. All of the social niceties had been ripped away and I was like an infant again except I was not 2 years old. I was 47 and expected to behave as if I was that age.

People forget that you learn so much when you are young. I know I did, until I had to relearn it all and quickly.

Even the ability to bear the touch of a human hand upon your body was gone from me.  Hands can burn  your skin when you don’t know how to bear the touch. Emotions and physical sensations can send you into a tail spin when suddenly you feel something that pulls you back into your body. When someone wants to hold you and you aren’t prepared it can feel like an assault on your being, despite the intent behind it. Eating food is an invasion, watching films that make you laugh or cry is overwhelming.  Needing to do something as simple as go to the toilet can also make you cry, if you are even aware of that sensation.

Dying itself isn’t hard. The side effects of recovery are:

As for heaven itself, I promise you that heaven is right here, just a hands breadth away and  in a different dimension. It is the part leading to the death that is difficult because you often have full of awareness of your demise, and few people will understand this. We have lost the ability to be close enough to our own selves that we can tell when we are dying and be comfortable with that.

But very few people die without knowing that they are about to. The worst for me has been the loss of parts of my life.  I have lost friends and I have lost family. My husband’s family decided that it was too uncomfortable to speak to a ‘dead’ person. To them, death is a taboo subject, so they cut off my husband and our children off, refusing to talk to them or me.

Other people, friends, just simply walked away. They didn’t know how to talk to us. Nor did the schools that our children attended. They would not allow any slack to these traumatised children, even though these kids were living with a distressed recovering mother, who was only partially aware of what was going on, but expected to look after them. If I said something weird or confronting, these people ran.  (Apparently making jokes about being a zombie is not cool.)

These are some of the side effects of dying and recovering, but certainly not all.

But the purpose behind this blog is to help those of you who are curious about what death and dying feels like, so…

About death itself:

• What you really need to know is that dying doesn’t hurt. You leave your body before you actually die. There is no pain.
• Heaven is real. You will be there before you know it, and you can switch back and forth as needed which does give an opportunity for recovery.
• You won’t be a ghost unless you want to be one.  Let go of your connection and you will not be a ghost.
• You will be met by your family within your cluster of people. You will not be left alone.
• Animals also go to heaven.
• There is a Force that some people call ‘God’ but not everyone uses the same name for that force.
• If you rejoin the God force, you will become part of the Universal energy that powers us all. We reincarnate because we are separate from It. Some people see this as ‘the tunnel’ but only less than 10% of NDErs see the light/tunnel.
• There are Beings there who will help you to transition. You may call them Angels. You may call them Guides.
• I did not see a hell, which does not mean that there isn’t one, but what would the point be? Your mission is to learn and grow and to do that, you need to cycle through all choices, all possibilities and with your free will, make the choice that is right.

Choose well.

(If you would like to learn more about heaven, or to have me come present to your group about the After life or Medical Intuition, please contact <info@carmelbell.com.au> for more information.)

Blessings,

Carmel Bell

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Dying and the Dead

 

 

10 things you should know about dealing with a dying person and 1 thing you can help them to do.

 

I remember when I first knew I was dying. It was a hard moment for me. I was standing alone in my bathroom, looking into the mirror as I put on makeup, getting ready for work.

Suddenly, my attention was diverted to my eyes. I stared into these familiar orbs and all I could see was death. The sight held me still for a few moments, dead in my tracks, I could say. I cannot tell you what exactly I saw, but I knew exactly what it was, what it meant.

I was already dead. All I was doing was waiting for time to catch up.

In that moment I decided to put my house in order. To my family’s perplexity, I insisted on power of attorneys being made out, both financial and medical. I reviewed my will and I wrote letters to my children and to my closest friends, which I then put aside to be handed out after my death, and I told one of my best girlfriends what food I wanted to be served at my wake. I felt prepared.

By the time I did this, I had already had two surgeries to rid myself of a persistent brain tumor. My heart had also been tested many times because during the night I would experience tachycardia but nothing could be found to be wrong. 10 or more years before I had been diagnosed with a rare condition and I had already survived beyond expectation for a person with the condition I had. Most of the visible symptoms were now gone, but this was an insidious disease that lurks silently for years, doing damage nonetheless.

My family and doctors were hopeful that I had defeated this condition. And although I prayed I had, I knew I hadn’t.

Everybody who is about to die knows it, even if they can’t articulate what they know. Even so, it is very common for outsiders to comment how odd it was that the now dead person had already been giving away things, or reconnecting with family or old friends.

But what I discovered, during this journey is that few people know how to deal with someone going through this process, particularly when it is someone close to them. They usually deny, ignore or laugh at it.

Death is an uncomfortable journey. If you are alive, you will die. In times past, we used to keep the bodies of our dead in their homes, laid out so that their families could spend time with them. They would be photographed with their parents or siblings and generally lived around until it was time to bury their remains. It has only been in recent times that the dead have been rushed off and sanitized.

And although it is not unusual to be given the gift of knowing that you are dying, few people seem to know what to do with the knowledge.

So, to assist those people, both the dying and the observers, I have written down what I know would have helped me.

And yes, I did die. But I was fortunate enough to be revived after close to an hour.

1: Don’t deny their feelings. Even if they are incorrect in the end, it doesn’t do any harm to acknowledge their preparedness and apprehension. We all die, so it is sensible to be prepared. For instance, my husband and I made out enduring powers of Attorney, both financial and medical. My family would have become destitute if we had not had those documents prepared beforehand. And my husband would not have had the legal right to decide on my treatment. Few people realize that without that, a hospital has the right to decide your treatment, not your family.

2: Ask each other how you would like to be celebrated. This is a great question to ask anyone you love. Death is the last journey you will make. It may as well be as close to your truth as you want. Make your wishes known.

3: Read about the dying process and grief. A dying person will go through the steps of grief before they die. Honor this.

4: Assure them that they will be missed after they die. It is often easy to feel that you will be quickly and easily forgotten. That was one of my concerns, that I would be forgotten.

5: Pick a date that you will keep as just theirs. It may be their birthday or their death day, or a day special to the two of you. Tell them that this will be your day together. Life will go on. You will meet new people, new loves and have new journeys. But as long as you remember the person who has died, they are not truly gone.

6: People who know that they are dying still like to laugh and be included in celebrations or outing. Don’t forget them. They are alive! They want to be included.

7: Encourage them to be physically active as they can be. Dying is no reason to give up living.

8: Acknowledge their fear and grief. Tell them you are happy to be with them, whatever mood they are in.

9: Help them to put their affairs in order. Make sure their Will is up to date, and any special things that they wish to give to people are marked down. This process will give them a sense of security.

10: Ask them if they know how they want to be disposed of, or if they wish to donate any organs, if appropriate.

That One thing: Tying up loose ends is not just about giving away possessions. It is also making sure that if they/you need to say or tell something to someone, try to make sure they/you do. Is there a secret they have been keeping? A regret they need to express, or an apology they need to make?

Regrets and hurts can last for a long time in those who are left behind. You can help them to clear some of those before they/you die.

Dying is hard. It is the last journey we will make and it is a solitary one. But until the moment your body takes the last breath and last heart beat, there is life.

Love every moment. Don’t take it with you to the grave.

 

 

A time to Live and a place to Die.

Even as a young child I didn’t like to be told what to do or how to think. I much preferred to lay my own path and make my own decisions.  I know that this desire gave my parents many moments of discomfort, when as a young child I would ask things such as “Why should I call God ‘Father’ when I have a perfectly good Father of my own?’

No answer I received was ever satisfactory. God wasn’t my Father. He was God and to me there was a Universe of difference.  And why should I cover my head, when men didn’t have to? How did that make sense?  It didn’t.  So far, I hadn’t found anything that boys could do that I couldn’t, except urinate standing up.  I did try and I did not like the results, but there is now a device for women that you can use, but I digress…

I first died when I was burned to death in a fire at four years of age.  Four is very young to endure such pain and damage to a body, and to understand the places I found myself in, along with the things I saw and the beings I spoke to.  Four years of age and being given a mission as immense as the one I was handed was confusing and traumatic. It took me years to integrate this experience and to try to even partially understand it – maybe I am a slow learner, maybe not.

But that experience and the ones that followed taught me one clear thing…

Every person, every soul, has only one guarantee in life, and that is that they have a time to live, and a place to die. That is the only guarantee any of us have.  The in between parts…they belong to you.  You have choices to make, decisions to form.  You can be celebratory or critical. You can laugh at the lengths the Universe goes to put you on the path, keep you on the path, and then make the path rough so that you learn or you can wallow in misery.

But whatever choice you make, this is your time to live. What are you going to fill the space in between with before you find your place to die? Because you are a long time dead.  And even with reincarnation, there are no do overs. You will never live this life again.  You will never connect in the same way with that person.

Make every moment matter. And not every moment has to be momentuous – after all, the bricks of a house need cement to stand strong against the storms.

Blessings, Carmel Bell

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Generosity of Spirit

8 Steps you can take when you feel overwhelmed by your life.

“You will discover that you have two hands. One is for helping yourself and the other is for helping others.” – Audrey Hepburn

See this dog?  His name is Andy and he came to me at a time in my life when I needed something to save me.  I had lost hope, faith and belief, and I was rapidly losing courage to continue.

Two brain tumours and a cardiac arrest, plus a rare disorder are a lot for anyone to survive and thrive after.

As a result, I put a call out to the Universe, via the wonderful method of falling to my knees, on my own – just touching the ground and screaming “Help me God! I can’t take it anymore!” My mind was torn between begging to live and pleading to be let die again.  Nothing had worked. I was not getting better. I had lived through virtual hell and felt I was still only half way through, when I reached this stage of desperation.

I had never suffered in a way like this felt before. It was excruciating, nauseating, unbearable emotional pain, so deep that it would make me feel like vomiting.

That was the point in my life when I made my plea to the Universe.

Strangely, I had put my hand up the week before to be given a rescue German Shepherd.  The anguish I witness in abandoned and abused animals was hellish.  I felt that even if I could do nothing else with my life, I could rescue a dog.

My family all objected. How would I manage it? they asked me. Could we afford it? Who would exercise this hypothetical dog?  I couldn’t.  I could barely walk upright for more than a few hundred yards, and we all knew that I was failing fast.  I had done too much, seen too much, given too much and I was an empty vessel.  I was numb or weeping in extreme emotional pain. Between Grief and nothing, I didn’t know which I preferred.

Then I received a call from German Shepherd Rescue Victoria. They asked me if I would  look at a dog that was in poor shape.  I looked at the photo of Andy. He was ragged, messy, underweight, unfriendly to other dogs, and a notorious escape artist.  He ran from everything and everyone.

“Yes,” I said, without much hesitation or thought. “Yes, I will.”  And so Andy was driven to my home to meet me.

He came in through the back gate to my yard and upstairs to my patio where I sat and waited, in front of the spot where I had fallen to my knees in my lowest point of my life.

He looked at me and I held out my hand, then he walked up to me and laid his head in my lap.

I could feel the bones in his body, smell the disorder of his health. But I could feel a heart inside him that beat and longed to be loved. A heart that had been almost as trammelled as mine. He was giving up, but he had not yet quit.

So, full of fear, I accepted. “He can stay,” I said. “We’ll see how we go.”

The rescue lady commented to me that she had never witnessed anything like that before. He was my dog, she declared, he had decided.

Then she left, leaving behind few instructions, a bag of dry food, a dog bowl that looked like a baby bowl it was so small and an old sleeping mat that was so thin, the sun could have shone through it.  Andy obviously had been a hobo, because there was nothing in these few little belongings that spoke of love or care.

He did not know how to play. Balls were a mystery, soft toys a threat.  Our cat was to be feared as was our son, whom he viewed as a dog assassin.  Andy would tremble with fear at almost everything.  A towel being shaken was clearly a nightmare, and baths were something designed to torture him. He would vomit when he ate, run and bury what food he could, hide his bowel movements, cry when I washed him.  Every night he had nightmares, crying, yelping and shaking in his sleep.  This big, bigger than average German Shepherd was a mess.

I started to take him for walks as best as I could.  I got him a new collar that didn’t choke him and a new lead, and a lady I met online sent me a panic vest.  And together,we began to walk. Every day, as far as both of us could.  Then slowly, Andy and I started to run.  Twenty feet at a time, then stop and walk for a while, then run again.

Together, we built up our endurance until we have reached this day.  Today, Andy is fit, healthy and muscles are showing in his body.  He is about 15kgs heavier than he was, and he sticks to me as close as he can at all times.

And now I too, can run. From staggering in despair,  barely making it three hundred feet, I now run with joy. A year has passed since Andy came to me to be rescued, and I have found that truly, Andy rescued me.

I expected nothing. All I wanted was to help another soul with the little I had left, and it was very little.  What I got in return was a life that I enjoy waking up to if Andy is asleep on the floor next to me.  I love his enthusiasm when I grab his leash, his pride when I buckle him up and head him out the door, and the complete magnificence of his uncrushable soul.

He has been a magnificent teacher. I expected nothing. I gained everything, and that is the spirit of generosity.  You give when someone needs. You expect nothing in exchange and you may find that your cup overflows with the benefits.

 

When you find yourself overwhelmed by life:

1: Take a deep breath and allow yourself to feel what is really going on.

2: Consider this possibility: are you doing what you have to do to get by, or is there something or someone in your life who inspires you to care more about your welfare? Someone, be it a person or an animal who needs you? If no, rescue an animal.

3: Are you exercising for joy or necessity? It does not matter what you do for exercise as long as it makes you feel great, and is not a duty.

4: Are you eating healthily? Sugar is a depressant. Natural foods will make you feel better.

5: Sunshine is needed, even if it is through clouds, dampened by rain, or dappled by trees.  You need sunshine and the feel of the earth beneath your feet.  Walk outside for at least a few minutes every day.

6: Every time you feel down or depressed, remind yourself that this is a hibernating period and that this kind of emotion will end.  Then you will be able to use the lessons from it for a greater purpose.

7: Find a cause or a way to help others. Be on the lookout for an opportunity to smile at someone, or give a compliment. Every positive act you take has a rebound effect on you.

8: Crying is a great release. Hug yourself and let yourself cry, without guilt. You don’t have to know why you are crying. Sometimes being alive is enough of a reason to cry.